第十五章 收小弟了(2 / 2)

大汉光熹 独看风起 0 字 2021-11-27

    “叫主公”我懒懒地说道。

    “拜见主公!”

    “拜见主公!”随着铿锵有力的声音,我看到了两只闪亮地眼睛,那是少年魏延的目光,他好像从我的话中听出来点什么,这孩子不管是不是那个魏延,看这个机灵劲都要好好地培养,指不定还会超过历史上的那个魏延。

    “今年几岁了,你又没有杀我异兽,为何也要拜我为主,?”我故意逗他。

    “回主公,小子今年十三岁。主公刚才教导说,师傅的东西就是徒弟的,我作为我师傅的弟子,按主公的教导,师傅的罪我自然也应该分担。还有,主公的胸怀一定宽广无比,因为只有纯洁、质朴、广有爱心的人,才能发出‘这个世界的爱还不够’,这等伟大的、气壮山河的、崇高的、无私的、无敌的、英明的、正确的……(省略二百字)惊天地泣鬼神的号召与口号,一定会用你那宽广的、博爱地、温柔的……省略三百字)无与伦比的爱心来安慰我这个无家可归的孩子!”小魏延的表情慷慨激昂,语气抑扬顿挫,表演力度不错,唯一欠缺的是没有横飞四溢的眼泪,要不然今年最佳小银人非他莫属。

    “你看,咳!我就这么一些缺点,竟然全被你发现了,如此看来,我做人真的很失败呀,我还要继续加倍努力才行。以后大家看到这些缺点,一定不要给我面子,狠狠地批判我,我这个人别的方面可能不行,但是!别人向我提出‘缺点’时,我还是会虚心接受嘀,绝对不会打击报复,所以,在以后的日子里,就请大家多多的提出宝贵意见。”我昂首向天,眯着眼睛陶醉的发表了,我对自己的关于批评问题的人生观。

    等了半天不见掌声响起,睁开眼睛一看:“哇KAO!你们都是怎么了?怎么一个个口吐白沫在地上抽搐不停?难道是——集体得了羊羔疯?”

    魏延昏过去的前一刻想:“世界上居然还有如此不要脸的人!我以为以前教我读书的先生脸皮已经是天下第一了,一直以他为榜样,今天才发现,人外有人天外有天,一山更有一山高,以后我一定以主公为榜样。‘你主宰,我崇拜,没有更好地办法’,主公,以后你就是我的偶像了!我从此又有了新的方向、新的动力!”

    回去的路上我禁不住傻呵呵的笑个不停,心里那个美呀,想不到祖上世代贫农的我,到了这里摇身一变就成了‘万恶的奴隶主’,家财万贯、良田百顷、王族出身,回去之后一定先要**一番,然后凭着王族身份,招上一批智士良将,说不定比曹操还牛上三分,忍不住仰天长笑。

    此时,我没有注意到,管家贝叔的脑门上,一丝丝黑线像闪电般的跳跃不停,冷汗淌得好如雪融地小溪。贝叔假装着咳嗽了两声,看到我依旧在傻傻发笑,没有看他,嘴巴嗫嚅了半天,下了半天决心轻声道:“少爷,我们守制还有三天未满,你又穿着孝服,万万是笑不得的,这是祖宗规矩。”

    看着管家贝叔那张生气中透着几分失望、几分担心的黑脸,我感到一阵想笑:“我靠,人已经死了差三天就到三年了,还那么认真,笑都不让笑一下,还让不让人活了!封建意识害死人呀!”于是我就想给他普及一些现代人文思想及意识形态,让**早日在黑暗的二世纪生根发芽开花结果。

    “主公!”憋得满脸通红的魏雄好像很努力的在组织语言。“主公,管家说的句句皆是金玉良言,望主公纳谏。”又想了想接着说:“你不是说过,要我们随时向你提出意见,并且不会打击报复。”

    “是呀,主公英明神武,肚子里能撑船跑马,怎么会在乎你提到的小小建议,我们应该时时刻刻牢记主公的话语,并且以主公的话为准则,好好学习好好做人。”说完小魏延抬头怯怯地望着我又道:“伟大的主公你说我理解的对不对?”

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