第636章 司法天神和驴不得不说的故事(1 / 2)

怒了!怒了!如来佛祖的法身,真的是怒了,自己的弟子,佛门精心挑选的取经人,一个转世十世,十世都是和尚的信徒,现在见到他这个佛祖,竟然是要给他定个掌,就因为他是倔。

这他娘的是一个弟子,能给自己的佛祖说的话吗,别人能说我们是倔驴,秃驴,可是我们不能说呀,不能承认呀。

尤其是你他娘的也是个和尚,你骂你们佛祖是倔驴,这礼貌吗。

如果你信仰的佛祖都是倔驴,那你是个啥,小倔驴,还是倔驴中的杂牌,骡子!

“哈哈哈!你这死和尚,你是不是调查过老舅我,你怎么知道我在没有成仙的时候,是给驴钉掌的,这他娘的都成几辈子之前的事情了,你竟然知道,你这死和尚还真的有点眼力。

不过既然你们说道了,那我就给你们分享一下我那时候给驴钉掌的事情,其实这个驴吗,虽然脾气倔了一点,但是只要你掌握了窍门,那还是很好控制。

就拿我的职业来说吧,钉掌!这个活你看起来简单,可是操作起来,可是一点的都不简单,而且还有风险。因为你弄不好,驴能踢到你的门牙。

所有钉掌的时候,这个对力道的掌控,那就至关重要了,就比如在给驴钉掌的之前,你要把驴的蹄子给削平整了,把那伸出来的掌,一刀下去给剁了。

当年我就是用这个小刀,给驴修掌的,那一刀下去,驴舒服的能叫,而对于那些不听话的驴,蹄子伸出太长的,你就要用猛刀了,一刀下去,直接就给他削到位。

还有一种不听话的野驴,这种驴最为难伺候了,他们自以为是驴界的老大,高高在上,驴掌伸的很长,动不动就要给别人说教,以为自己多么了不起。

我给你们说,对于这种野驴,你也不用先给他们钉掌,你直接上去,把他伸长的蹄子砍掉,然后别管他,等下一次在来的时候,在剁一次,这样有两三下,这野驴也就服服帖帖了。

你们看!我这小刀,不久前就剁了驴的一个掌,也是这个职业太解压了,所以我成仙这么久了,还是忘不了以前的职业,就把这削驴蹄子的刀,练成法宝,一直待在身上。

不管是看到野驴,还是倔驴,或者那秃啥的,只要看到他们的手伸长,老舅就会毫不犹豫的一到下去,给他修理修理蹄子!”

叶逸风手里拿着斩仙飞刀,煞有其事的给孙悟空和唐僧讲解他的削驴蹄子的过程,完全就不顾如来佛祖的法身,被气的头上冒烟。

“哦!厉害呀老舅!没有看出来,你这都成仙了,竟然还不忘初心,佩服!佩服,阿弥陀佛,,我佛慈悲,我应该向老舅你多学习,佩服!

而且老舅我觉得你应该出一本书,把你给驴钉掌的事情,记录下来,传承给世人,这书名我都给你想好了,就叫《司法天神和驴不得不说的故事!》”

唐僧一句阿弥陀佛,让如来佛祖法身的脸上的肌肉,抽动了几下,这是被气的呀。

“嘿嘿嘿!舅姥爷牛逼,舅姥爷说的对,不管是什么驴,就要教训,让俺老孙看,光是削驴蹄子还不够,应该在配个小皮鞭,啪啪啪的抽着,那倔驴才能不倔!”

孙悟空戏谑的笑着,给叶逸风说话,眼睛却一直对着如来佛祖法身,还不忘记眨巴眨巴几下。

在场的四个人,甚至是暗中观察这一切的人,都知道叶逸风说的这些话,是要气死如来佛祖的节奏。

“这个建议好,以后应该配备一个,不过悟空你要知道,给驴钉掌其实是和马钉掌一样,都是为了它们好,只是畜生不明白主人的好意而已。

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